Posts Tagged ‘my mom’

On Babies and Bravery

Devin Decorating

When I found out he was coming, I was terrified. I was afraid for all the hurt and tears and pain that might be waiting for the people I loved the most – my brother, my niece or nephew, my sister-in-love who seemed naively optimistic.  I couldn’t untangle my grief over Jay being arrested with the news […]


A Hole At The Table


My family is having Thanksgiving dinner without me today. My mom and my brothers, along with the rest of their families, will gather around a table and turkey, 1400 miles to the north of me in a small ranch house in Iowa.  They’ll laugh and they’ll eat and they’ll make fun of one another.  They’ll […]


The Worst Day

I thought I had survived The Apocalypse. I thought I had lived through the worst. I was wrong. Yesterday, in the early afternoon hours, I received an email that would forever change the course of my life.  It would, I think, change the very fabric of me.  Permanently. I was standing up when I read […]


The Mountain. (Or: By the end of the week I’ll have killed this blog entirely with all this emotional shit. So there’s that.)

My therapist described it as going up a mountain. Right now, it feels more like falling on my ass. Over and over and over again. Unless you’re rock climbing, you don’t go straight up a mountain.  You go around it.  And it can feel like you’re just going round and round in an ever looping […]


In Which I Educate My Mom On Whoredom And Decide Not To Bitch To The Internet. For Once.

“Alright, Mom.  I have to go.” Our morning conversation was beginning to bleed into my working hours and I could no longer ignore the screams from my inbox. “OK, baby.  I love you.” “I love you, too.  Thanks for listening to me be a raging whore all morning.” “Mmm… I’d say raging bitch.” “Oh.  Right.” […]