She calls them “appreciations”, and we have to do them every day.

“I appreciate that…” and once a day your spouse comes up with something, anything, about you that is worthy of being appreciated.

Some days are harder than others.

“I appreciate that you finally decided to drop it.”

“You should appreciate that I didn’t kill you.  I appreciate that you’re not dead right now, because you could be.”

“I appreciate that you try to do your appreciations – even if you suck at them.”

But most of the time we do alright.  And I think we’ve learned a lot about each other in the process, especially about what we value in one another most.  He hasn’t once said that he appreciates my excellent taste in footwear or the time I spend keeping myself pretty, but he’s thanked me for spending time with him on more than one occassion.

Anyway, appreciations.  In the spirit of Thanksgiving and the general Internet assumption that you’ll lazily donate at least one post to number off the things you’re thankful for, I’m breaking the One A Day Rule.

I appreciate, Jared, …

that you show up.

that you keep trying.

that you always snuggle up behind me at night.

that you never ask me to roll over or give you more space.

that you cook and clean and do laundry without acting like you’re doing me some huge favor.

that you always call back.

that you want to know my friends.

that you started reading this blog.

that you didn’t it read it years ago because you thought I wanted privacy, even if I didn’t.

that you’ve never referred to parenting as babysitting.

that you pray.

that you’ve spent hours organizing your music.

that you look good in a suit.

that you dance in your underwear.

that you’ll read that and say “I have no idea what you’re talking about”.

that you wouldn’t make me popcorn last night, but brought me veggies and dip instead.

that you paint my toenails.

that you’re amazing at your job.

that you’ve stopped taking work calls at night.

that you close the bathroom door in the morning when you think I’m still asleep.

that you are a really great friend to other guys.

that you fantasize about moving to New York City with me.

that you also fantasize about moving to Jamaica, Mexico or the Bahamas.

that you’re looking forward to Thanksgiving just as much as I am.

Happy Thanksgiving.

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  1. Shash says:

    Happy Thanksgiving! I love you guys. :)

  2. stacy says:

    I am reading this post from the waiting room of my therapists office. It has helped me go into my couples therapy with a better attitude. Thanks!

  3. Aww Britt, this was an absolutely wonderful post. I am so glad things are going well with you & Jared. We will have to get together in a few weeks so he can meet Misk. Misk needs some guy friends, and I think he and Jared would get along great!

    Plus, ya know, our kids too.

    Happy Thanksgiving to You and Yours!

  4. this was a wonderful post. focusing on the positive is awesome.

    i appreciate that jared asked you if it would be cool to knock on the closed door to come hug me hello. in his underwear. while i was in mine. and i appreciate that you said of course he should hug me hello, regardless of his attire.

    love you guys.

    happy, happy thanksgiving.

  5. Robin says:

    See? I knew you guys would come through this….it can only get better from here, right?

  6. Hockeymandad says:

    Jared is one lucky dude.

    Happy turkey day Britts….hope to see you all again soon!

  7. Sybil Law says:

    Happy Thanksgiving!

  8. Finn says:

    Well look at that, you’re almost as lucky as he is. ;)

    Happy Thanksgiving, kids. Big hugs to all of you.

  9. Happy Thanksgiving! I’m sure Jared has a list just as long about things he appreciates about you too. Hugs to your whole family!

  10. Lisa says:

    Dancing in his underwear made me smile because my hubs does the same thing.

    This is a great thing you do for each other. Happy Thanksgiving, Britt!

  11. I’m so happy for you both. Have a great Thanksgiving.

  12. Aww, these were really nice and I’m stealing the idea. Heh.

    Have a great Thanksgiving! Hugs and love.

  13. Headless Mom says:

    I think this is the perfect Thanksgiving post. Have a great day!

  14. “…that you never ask me to roll over or give you more space.”

    Jared is a saint. For real. I hate hate hate being asked to move over.

  15. Stephanie says:

    I appreciate you & this blog, that keeps me thinking and gives me courage to be more vocal. Happy thanksgiving, Britters!

  16. CP says:

    I appreciate that both of you decided to forge ahead rather than throw your hands up in the air and give up. And someday, your children will be blogging about their appreciation of mommy and daddy showing them what true love and respect really looks like.

    You guys are a miracle in the making.

    Love you both.

  17. Tonz says:

    I’m having a bad day and this post made me cry.

  18. I appreciate that this year’s Thanksgiving will be the opposite of last year’s.

  19. [...] from Britt. I’m going to do as many of these as possible this [...]

  20. Selma says:

    That is a really nice list. Made me realise I have a lot to appreciate too. Have a great Thanksgiving!

  21. Cara says:

    Thanks for the reminder to let my husband know why I appreciate him. Sometimes those things do need to be said aloud.

  22. Kristin says:

    And I sigh as I read this because I’ve been ultra pissy with my husband recently because, plainly put, he’s a man and I’ve run out of steam.

    But I really liked your appreciations. Those are the day to day ones, like the bathroom door, that my husband does too. Sigh.

  23. Becca says:

    Happy Turkey day Britt and Jared, thank you guys for everything you share. Britt, you have inspired me this year with your writing and your honesty! :)

  24. Jared says:


    I am thankful/Appreciate:

    That you are here
    That you are such a beautiful writer
    That you are classy
    That you are a great party/dinner host
    That you dress up to leave the house
    That you look hot in a dress
    That you have style
    That you know and can sing along to almost anything
    That you get random raises, just because you are that good at your work
    That you feel you are destine for greatness
    That you step up in a crisis
    That you get hooked on TV series
    That you are awesome mom

    • Faiqa says:

      @Jared, OHMYGOD… you are so sweet. :)

      P.S. Jared, I appreciate that you appreciate my friend so much.

      Happy Thanksgiving to you guys & love always.

  25. LOL! My husband and I say, “I have no idea what you’re talking about” to each other all the time. But we say it in sort of an Anchorman type tone. It sounds ridiculous but it cracks us up!

  26. Matt-Man says:

    Is this a serious post? ‘Cause it sounds like a a bunch of self-centered bullshit and pretentious angst. You are kidding…right? Cheers!!

  27. muskrat says:

    glad y’all have much to be thankful for and recognize it…hope it was a happy day/weekend.

  28. Bre says:

    Love this.
    I love that you guys are growing together… It gives us un-married individuals something to learn from.
    Love you guys.

  29. dad says:

    very nice!
    love you always

  30. racheal says:

    this was beautiful.

    You know, as heartbroken as I am about what has happened in my life, I am so touched by what is happening with yours.

    This was so so beautiful and heartwarming to read.

    You make me believe Britt, thank you.

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