One Year: the real reason I didn’t blog this earlier

Sunday marked one year since we left our families behind in Iowa and moved to Florida.

If I’m being completely honest, that’s part of the reason I didn’t turn on the computer this weekend. I knew that in the computer was this blog, this place where I’ve documented every moment of this transition, this place where I knew at some point I would have to acknowledge the one year anniversary.

And I wasn’t ready.

A week ago I was ready. A week ago I was already compiling the One Year post in my head and mentally marveling at how far we had come in a year – how far I had come in just 12 months.

I was thinking about how being hundreds of miles away from grandparents and a reliable support system had forced me to become a better wife and mother. Without the luxury of well lit escape routes, we have all had to learn how to stick it out and cling to one another. It hasn’t always been easy, but it’s been worth it.

A week ago I was reveling in how much I’ve done since moving here. My kids have learned to take for granted things like amusement parks and white sandy beaches a friends who speak more than one language, while still hanging on to an innocent fascination with Mickey Mouse. I have enjoyed being near a major international airport with flights that will take you directly to a destination people are actually interested in flying to. Like, oh, say, New York City.

But more than that, I’ve found myself here. I’ve proven to myself that the world is both great big and completely attainable, and that I can survive Out In It. I have built a life here, from scratch. From nothing. A life that is already full of work and school and kids and friends and stories. A life that is mine and ours and no one else’s.

And I was damn proud of that. A week ago.

In fact, I was seriously contemplated removing the whole Big Move section from my sidebar. Because clearly that is so 2007 and I am so, so far beyond thinking it’s a big deal anymore.

And then I went to see Momma Mia! with Shash.

I laughed and sang and danced in my chair. I was thrilled to be able to spend a few hours with Shash and some of her gal pals. And yet, even still, I spent the entire two hours in that theater thinking “Mom would love this movie. This would be the perfect movie for us to see together.” I sobbed during the nostalgic mother/daughter scene, remembering the countless times my own mother and I had curled up into each other, crying and laughing at our favorite movies.

I have found myself longing for my mother’s touch ever since. Her voice is still familiar to me thanks to near daily phone calls, but the feel of her face against mine is merely a kinetic memory that escapes me when I am fully awake.

As the weekend approached and the nights home alone piled up, one more on top of another, I was consumed with loneliness. I missed my best friend Erin and the ease that I can only find in her company. I sat in my quiet house and strained to hear her breezing in through my front door, uninvited but always welcomed. I spoke with her over the phone, but my eyes filled with tears in the absence of the sight of her.

And all of a sudden, I was no longer ready.

A year has gone by and still I find myself drenched in homesickness.

Sure, I’ve made friends. But none that could replace a woman I had loved since we were girls, a woman who never had to be invited or asked to leave. Yes, I’ve made a little progress on this house with a few painted walls and some carefully selected window treatments. But nothing that’s gone on between these walls can replace the remarkable history that I left behind in those two old houses.

I’ve been here a year, I thought, and still I find myself confused about where my home is.

And then I spent the weekend with one of the first friends I made here. She asked how I was, and before I could finish getting out the words “I’ve been missing my family and friends,” I saw the answer I didn’t know I’d been looking for in her eyes.

Deanna has lived here for almost 7 years with her husband and son. She knows all too well about holidays spent away from your traditions and inside jokes based on history that are hard to replace. Her whole family is even farther away from mine in Canada.

She nodded and as she started to speak, I realized I was finishing her sentence. “Yeah, that doesn’t go away. Not really.”

And it doesn’t. Not really.

You move out and you move on and you build a whole new life for yourself. But you never really leave it all behind. Not if you’re lucky.

If you’re lucky, you find that your past and the people who’ve shared it with you continue to matter – even in the face of a brand new future. They matter so much that sometimes, unexpectedly, it still hurts.

And now… I’m ready.

I’m ready to tell you that I’ve been here a year. And I’ve done a lot and learned a lot since packing up that U-Haul last August – most of which I’ve already told you about just as it was all happening.

But mostly, I’m ready to tell you about the thing that I had to be here a year to truly learn.

It still hurts. And that’s OK.

I came here looking for Happiness, and learned that it is OK to be sad. It’s OK to cry and to yearn and to miss. It’s OK to doubt and to worry and to wonder what if. It’s OK – and even awesome and wonderful and truly bliss – to find yourself completely lost once in awhile.

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  1. avitable says:

    I’m glad that you’ve learned that and are okay with it. Now I just have to reach that point. I still feel bad and powerless when you get upset and sad, and I know that I shouldn’t.

  2. Christine says:

    Since everything is always all about ME, I have to tell you that as I read this I had two thoughts that kept looping:

    1.) I miss my Mommy.
    2.) I hope my daughter (and son) crave being with me as much as you do your mom.

    What a testament to your mom.

  3. Shash says:

    Sitting there in that theater with you I could feel your sadness during that scene. I felt the same way, but for a completely different reason that I shared with you. All the while though while we sat there I was so glad you joined us. We really did have a great time.

    I wish we lived closer (like neighbors). I really look forward to our families hanging out together. Soon, yes?

    I’m so sorry the movie we saw made you feel sad and homesick. I feel bad about that.

    Your mom is one amazing lady. So is her daughter. :)

    I’m SO glad you’re here.

    Hugs,
    Shash

  4. kateanon says:

    I’ve been in a new place for almost 6 months – and I hate it. And, yeah, it does hurt. I hope you can deal with that hurt – and I’m glad you get to talk to your family as often as you do. Here’s hoping you can visit them soon.

  5. Sybil Law says:

    Proven was definitely the right word.
    And this post just made me all sad, but happy, too – that you even have such great connections and memories. You’re so fricking smart and capable, and we all know how proud your mom is of you – with good reason!
    Me go cry now.
    :cry: :heartbeat:

  6. I feel ya. We live just around the corner from my parents and I know that I’m lucky to have them that close, even when it feels too close.

  7. Cris says:

    …and me! You didn’t mention me! I started reading your blog right about the time you moved. So that means you acquired me during that year of racking up wonderful trophies. Trophies that you now view as so much useless bling and that can’t take the place of your real family. but… HELLO… still here…

  8. X says:

    Homesickness sucks. You know what you need? A really shitty trip home. That’ll cure you. :)

  9. Britt's Mom says:

    Noooooooooooo…what she needs is for me to come down to visit in LESS THAN TWO MONTHS and I promise you, in a week, she’s be dancing in the streets again when I go home.

    Hehehehehehehehehehehe

  10. libragirl says:

    I only live about 3 hours from my parents and see and talk to them all the time but I still have that homesickness feeling when I need my mom and dad and don’t want to be living alone.
    I still say I am going home for the weekend, when home is in NJ, not LI which is my parents house.

  11. sodapop says:

    WOW! What a beautifully written post, Britt.

    I can relate to the homesickness. I just got back from a weekend in Las Vegas visiting my two best friends. A woman and a man whom I can be totally and completely comfortable and myself with. I have found that with very few people in my life and I miss it. I miss them.

    I realized while I was in Vegas that while I don’t miss the city itself and I now consider Louisville my home, I still miss my friends something fierce.

    My depression when I moved her engulfed me into isolating and not wanting to make friends. 10 months later, I still have very few friends here in Louisville. I’m working on getting out more and am going to join some things at church, just to get me involved.

    In 2 months, I will have been where I’m at for a year. In a way, we’ve been on this journey together because you’ve shared so much of your life here. I appreciate that. And I love you more for being so open and honest with where you really are at emotionally at the moment.

    Homesickness never goes away, I think. It just takes time to get to that “acceptance” level and being OK with it. I’m glad you made it there :)

  12. SciFi Dad says:

    I completely get what you’re saying here, and I totally agree. It’s that longing for home that keeps pulling me back, even when I know I’d be happier if I didn’t go. (You read the post about my mother and me from last weekend.) Granted, the distance isn’t the same, but 4h in a car with a toddler can feel like an eternity (not to mention that with a breastfeeding infant, the trip’s more like 6-7 hours).

    I moved out at 19, and for five years did a co-op program where I moved around, often not seeing my parents for four months at a time. Then I moved here (the area anyways) and got home every once in a while. Then I met a girl, got married, and had a kid. And because my in-laws suck, every other Christmas I get to feel completely alone (even though I’m with people).

    So uhm yeah. Missing family? Check. Lonely holidays? Check. I feel ya. (But not in an inappropriate way, y’know what I mean?)

  13. if your mom goes to adam’s halloween party i will pee my pants. and i really, really wanna pee my pants. wait. dammit. no. i just really, really wanna hug your mudder.

    thank you for the warning about momma mia. i now without a doubt will not go see it in the theater. there was one movie (big fish) that had me sobbing uncontrollably about my mom, don’t want that again!

    britt, i am so proud of you for being on your own with your family in florida. i really am.

  14. Kristin says:

    Good post babe!
    I feel the same thing each day. And, every time I go home it’s harder to leave.
    I am not sure why this is, but that’s how it’s happening.
    I am so proud of you, and if ANYONE can do it, you’re the one!
    Love you!

  15. Poppy says:

    :hug:

    I feel so fortunate that I am 6 short hours away from the life I knew. But someday we’ll move farther away and I will know your pain. I do know the Mom Pain, though. My mom moved away shortly after I graduated college and lept into The Real World. … Ow, ow owowowowow. I was shocked, devastated, couldn’t believe she was leaving me!… and then time passed and I realized people need to live their own lives, do what makes them happy. Which is what you did. And what I did 10 years later. :)

  16. steen says:

    Aww. I’ve been missing my mom a lot lately; she moved out of my hometown (Fort Myers) to some small town in Arkansas so I rarely get to see her. My wedding was the only time I’ve seen her in something like four years.

    I hope you enjoy your time with your mom!

    (Also: how did I not know you and Dee are friends? I vote we all go out to dinner at Crazy Buffet one night!)

  17. Jen, South Florida says:

    I totally relate to the homesick part. I am originally from Chicago and Jim from Jersey.

    I moved away from Illinois in 1997, to Arizona. Met Jim there, we packed up and moved here in 2003. We swore we would never make a huge move like that again.

    We are currently throwing around the idea of moving to Orlando. We hate the area we are in with the fiery, burning passion of 1000 suns.

    Any tips?

  18. I live less than 15 minutes from my parents, and 20 minutes from Dave’s. Early on in our marriage when we struggled more, we often toyed with the idea of moving thousands of miles away from those outside influences. Every once in a while, it still crosses my mind. Thanks for the reminder that I’m right where I need to be.

  19. Robina says:

    Ah Britt. You have been an amazing woman, mother, and wife during all this, not to mention daughter. The love you and your mother have for each other truly astounds me, cause I never had that with mine. When I left at the age of 18, I was so happy to be away from her, my family, and my hometown, I never once got homesick.

    But after living in TN for 15 years, I find when I have to go out of town, I do get homesick. I miss my house, my stuff, my animals, my work, my routine, all of it. But at least I’ll be back in a few short days.

    I wish I could comfort you in some way, but then again, you are doing fine, and probably don’t need it.

    This was beautiful, and if the relationship you and your mother has wasn’t so truly beautiful, I’d be jealous!

  20. Momma says:

    Hey, Britt’s Mom.

    I hear ya. Now when we come to visit, we stay a couple of hours away in our own place, where they are forced to visit us
    ( and therefore follow “our way of doing things”) and we visit them weekends, when I cook, clean and do laundry, forcing Dee to miss me even more when I leave. hehehehehe.
    ~ And my grandson thinks I walk on water.~ :angel:

    I am a manipulative Momma, but if you knew Dee, you’d know it’s necessary to be so. :evil:

  21. whall says:

    I’m still in the same town as my mommy and daddy and I like it that way.

    (PS: i’m glad that I’ve been around long enough to remember the move!)

    (PS2: a home gaming system made by Sony)

    (btw: I loved Mamma Mia too!)

  22. Fantastagirl says:

    The furthest I have ever lived away from my parents is 4 hours. Which sometimes is just right, and other times just not far enough. But I’ll never be able to go “home” for the weekend. My parents moved from my hometown several years ago, and it’s not the same.

  23. Hey, it could always be worse. Like my experience….
    In 2002, my husband convinced me that we should move to Memphis, TN. He said his mother was living there and she had a better job lined up for him, there would be a support system of family up there, yadda yadda yadda…. so against this native Floridian’s judgement I moved my whole family on the word of my husband’s mother. I hated it. Couldn’t stand it. His mother turned out to be a pill popping freak of a woman who was only interested in milking us for as much money, time, etc she could get out of us, Memphis was a shithole with very few and far between brightspots in it, the education system in Memphis was a full grade behind any “f” school here in Fla, and we were constantly harassed by crime, i.e. being robbed, mugged, and our cars broken into. To top it all off, when I finally said enough is enough and we were moving back to Fla, my support system here fell apart. My Mother and Father no longer were speaking to me because I had moved, my friends had become scattered and hard to reach, and I and my family eventually became homeless. Great right? See….. your experience is waaaaaaaaay better than mine was! I bet after a while (well, maybe a long while) this place will feel kinda homey. Then again….. maybe not. :lol:

  24. Mindy says:

    The relationship that you have with your mom is awesome. You may be a great distance away from your family but in reality they are never that far away from you. Deep inside your heart you know it! :hug:

  25. Sammanthia says:

    You said it better than I ever could… we moved to KY from MI 2 years ago, and I was beginning to think something was wrong with me, that I shouldn’t miss it anymore. I like it here, though, so I’m luckier than you, but I still think of MI as “home”.

  26. Finn says:

    Strange how the heart can hold such different emotions about the same thing.

    I imagine, like anything, it gets easier over time. Doesn’t go away, just gets easier. Or you get used to it.

    And home? It’s where your heart is. Even if that’s scattered across the country.

  27. Great post, Miss Britt!

  28. Miss Britt says:

    avitable: well you “shouldn’t” should on yourself, as Becky would say. ;-)

    But, um, yeah – life would probably be a whole lot easier for you if you were more comfortable with the Dark Side. Heh.

    Christine: well, let me tell you this – there have been times when I hated my mom. So if your kids ever go through that? Have faith.

    Shash: I wish we were neighbors too. That’s one of the drawbacks of living in a bigger “town” – we’re all so damn spread out!

    But yes, definitely get together. I say we meet at your pool. LOL

    kateanon: give it time. After 6 months I had no idea if I’d done the right thing yet or not.

    Sybil Law: I love this comment, Sybil. It’s so.. perfect.

    Undomestic Diva: for me, I could never have been who I needed to be if I’d stayed that close. But it’s good to know the blessings you have right in front of you too.

    Cris: LMAO, you crack me up.

    But seriously? You’ve only been reading me a YEAR??

    I might have to move you down the “favorite commenters” list. Sorry.

    X: nah, I don’t need to be cured. A great weekend at the beach helped put things into perspective for me.

    Britt’s Mom: that is probably true. But the first two days will be AWESOME!! :D

    libragirl: when I first moved here I defiantly refused to call Iowa “home” as in “going back home”.

    Now I’m OK with it. It IS home. And so is Florida. And NYC. And Chicago.

    And that’s cool, ya know?

    sodapop: it’s cool we’ve been going through this stuff at about the same time, huh?

    I think the first 6 months is the hardest. It took me forever to really start meeting people and to feel like I was starting to make my own “circle”. Hell, I’m STILL in the baby stages of that.

    SciFi Dad: you totally want to feel me inappropriately. I’M ON TO YOU, MAN!

    hello haha narf: I don’t know how you do it babe. I really don’t. My heart hurts for you to think about.. no, I can’t even go there.

    Kristin: yeah, I worry about you though. You didn’t exactly pick Ohio.

    Poppy: I’ve always been surprised that my mom DIDN’T immediately pack up and move when we moved out. LOL

    steen: once in four years? Ouch. That’s rough.

    Jen, South Florida: I, personally, love central Florida. Especially where we are. I love the mix of beach and attractions.

    maggie, dammit: any time. ;-)

    Robina: our relationship hasn’t always been this easy. Believe me.

    Momma: did you hear that Mom? She does Dee’s LAUNDRY!!

    I’m just kidding. Don’t touch my laundry. Not that I don’t trust your domestic skills, but…

    Yeah. Just come hang out. K?

    whall: I’m glad you’ve been around long enough too. I forget sometimes that some people here don’t know the whole backstory.

    Fantastagirl: I’ve never had a “home” like that because we moved a lot as a kid. But my grandparent’s houses all represented that for me. I was CRUSHED when my Nana sold her Chicago home.

    blondefabulous: oy. Way worse. I don’t think my experience is even in the running for “worse” – I’ve been really lucky all in all.

    Mindy: yeah, I know. ;-)

    Sammanthia: I didn’t mean to give the impression I don’t like it here. I LOVE it here. I CHOSE here for all the reasons I love it here.

    Finn: yep, you get used to it. That’s what it is.

    Queen of Shake Shake: thank you.

  29. Hilly says:

    You are a beautiful person, Britt. I am glad this journey is teaching you things, shaking you up, then teaching you more. But more importantly, you are amazing for rolling with it all the way.

  30. Dawn says:

    I feel you.

    I lived in Montreal, within 10 minutes of driving to everyone in my life who mattered, for the first 40 years of my life.

    Then, when I moved to Connecticut with my husband, I felt lost. I still do. I didn’t ever imagine that I’d feel this way moving away from home, but in retrospect, I can’t believe how it’s possible that I DIDN’T imagine it. How COULD I have left HOME and not KNOW that I’d feel this way?

    I talk to my Dad every single morning, but it’s not the same.

    But sometimes, that love from home feels even stronger. Maybe because it had to travel some distance, and it gained some strength along the way.

    :heartbeat:

  31. Mary Beth says:

    It’s good that you have that kind of relationship with your mom – I’m the same way which is why I’m still in NJ (well that and I really kind of like it here :D )

  32. Don says:

    Dear Miss Britt”

    You write with great poignancy and grace. It is rare to find such acuteness of self awareness in one so young. Don’t ever stop writing. The world needs your passion and compassion.

    I have found grief and mourning to be the soil out of which new growth springs. We mourn the loss of what was even as we grow into new lives with new experiences and relationships. I read somewhere that in the forest there is a kind of seed that does not germinate until it has been baked by a forest fire. In the wake of great destruction nature has designed a way to regenerate itself.

    Wise ones have always known this. Growth proceeds out of adversity. But only if we choose growth and you have. You have very good reason to celebrate your accomplishments of the past year. Good for you! It is equally important to mourn the things you have lost: childhood innocence, a way of life that was meaningful and enriching, a particular style of relationships and other things I’m sure you could name.

    All things change. Even if you had stayed in your hometown people and relationships would have changed. People die, move away, change. You would still have mourned, though perhaps not as strongly.

    You and your husband chose to make a radical change. Your hope was that it would be for the better. Clearly, the old hometown wasn’t meeting your needs any more. Equally as clear is that you are making a new life for yourself and your family that is richly rewarding.

    Keep on growing. Celebrate and glory in your new growth even as you mourn that which no longer is. Both are inseparable parts of being human.

    Don

  33. Kate says:

    You are brave.

    I lived in Florida for 4 years while I served in the Navy. I felt that pain. After my 4 years I got out and came back home.
    Many times I wish I had made it a career,
    but I just couldn’t take the pain of missing my family and missing my “real” home so much!

  34. Great post. I was nodding all through it having moved to Florida from Illinois and away from all of my family and friends.

  35. Chrissi says:

    I can TOTALLY relate.

    Having moved down to Tampa area almost 2 years ago I experienced SO many emotions.

    On Friday – My son and I are moving back to Washington – driving 3000 miles. Hubby will follow soon, when he can relocate back to Washington state.

    I tried it – I failed. I couldn’t be away from family and friends any longer.

    Also,for my sons sake – he needs to be back in a decent school. When arriving here it was amazing how far ahead he was academically. After sending his transcripts back to WA state, he’s behind with credits now. I don’t understand the differences in education.

    However, I do love Florida. It’s beaches and all the great stuff to do.

    Wish I could have met some of these Florida bloggers ! But hey – I’ll be in the same town as Dave2 – ya’ll will have to come out there for a visit!

  36. I remember being four months pregnant with the twins, standing in the shower of my childhood home, the home my grandfather built, the home my mother would be moving out of in two month’s time, and sobbed knowing I would never come back, that someone else not of our family would live here and paint the walls a different color, put down new carpet, and make new memories. Memories that I wouldn’t be a part of. And it hurt so very badly. But I knew then, like I know now, that change is good. Change is positive. I cried and I still cry, but I rejoice over the physical home that is now my home, and my Georgia friends who I hold dear and the West Virginia friends who I don’t see much but who I hold even more dear.

    It’s OK. That much I know. It’s totally OK. And I love you for it.

  37. ali says:

    sometimes i’m sad that i’m not near my family. near my mom or my stepdad, near my dad or my stepmom, near either of my brother, or my sister…

    but you are right. being alone forces me to be better! a better wife and mom!

    you will get there. i cried for the first, oh, um, 4 YEARS that i lived in Toronto. and every year it gets better. it’s tough, moving someplace new. HUGS.

  38. Jerri Ann says:

    I just found your blog a week or so ago so I haven’t learned yet why you moved…I’m reading though….but I want to say, I was a complete daddy’s girl. He died when I was 19 and for years I moved around all over the place without nary a thought of hard it was by myself. Then, I turned 30.

    I still loved my mom dearly but I just didn’t have that connection with her that I had always had with my father. Then, I got married. She was living in Northern Alabama where I grew up and I was with my huz living in central Florida. Being pregnant was the breaking point for me…I just wanted my mommmy. I was sick the entire pregnancy and my husband just didn’t get that no matter what he did, he was not my mommy.

    I will be 40 next month, I live less than 100 yards from her. I can watch my boys run from my house to hers when they are given permission. I can’t imagine how I made all the years before.

    My father died almost 20 years ago exactly…Aug. 22, 1988. My g-ma (his mother) is 82 and she is sick now and I don’t know how much longer I will have her. It stings, it still stings…really bad.

    So, all I know to say to you is keep your chin up and remember it is ok to close your eyes and live in the memories every once in a while!

  39. Hiding says:

    You know, I’ve been following you on Twitter and I love your updates.

    This post hit me. You know, I’m 52 and I left “home” 19 years ago. I still miss it.

    I lost my mom 19 years ago.. and there isn’t a day that goes by I don’t miss her. And yes, I still get choked up at mother-daughter scenes in movies.

    Thanks for showing us that sometimes we can push through our grief, and other times we just have to be in it. And both are okay.

  40. DeannaBanana says:

    Has no one even picked up that I am so difficultly awesome that they dont even stay in my house? Yeah…they rent their own house, more than two hours away when I am sitting inside 3600 sq ft. And it is awesome. Heh.

    But hey, it works!
    :evil: :disco: :disco: :evil:

  41. John says:

    A couple of months ago, you wrote a post about how online friendships take time, just like they do in real life. I know that YOU know that feeling comfortable in a new home that is so far from your old home takes time too. More than a year. If Florida feels like home in your heart, everything else will catch up. : )

  42. Sarah says:

    As much as I talk about ‘getting away’ from the bo-dunk town I grew up in and still live in I know I will miss my parents as much as you still miss your family.

    Sometimes when I’m home alone and I hear a noise that sounds too much like footsteps I still call out for my Dad even though he’s golfing or at work. In those moments I wonder how I’ll cope with it when I move out, move away. I know I will but sometimes it seems like it might be too hard to do it.

    But enough about me. Britt I am just really happy and proud for you. It’s not easy to move away from everything and the fact that you are able to sit there and blog about being OK is a wonderful thing. Really is. :hug:

  43. Very thoughtful post. Helped me to feel among similar minds :-)

    I was close to your age when we moved from Indiana to South Florida. I’d like to tell you that the feeling will disappear, but for me, it has only gotten worse.

    On a happier note, my daughter is thrilled that she was raised here instead of our small hometown.

  44. AmyD says:

    I try not to think of the couple of years I lived away from my mom. It was AWFUL. AWFUL!!! :hug:

  45. Winter says:

    I get teary eyed and want to go home every time Jester tells someone it’s 68 degrees and cloudy. It makes me really homesick.

  46. Miss Britt says:

    Hilly: thanks babe – and ditto.

    Dawn: I was totally unprepared too – how naive were we? LOL

    Mary Beth: LOL, well, if you LIKE it I suppose you should stay.

    Don: thank you – I definitely believe we grow the most through adversity.

    Kate: oh I don’t know how brave I am. I came running down here without a clue about how hard it could get. LOL

    Ok, Where Was I?: ah see, so you’re in the “we know” club too.

    Chrissi: you did NOT fail. You tried it – that’s more than a LOT of people do.

    That being said – I understand that feeling. Like you’re crawling back home or something.

    You’re not. You are not going back a failure – OK?

    Coal Miner’s Granddaughter: love you too.

    ali: 4 years?!?!? Oh shit. The blog will surely break from the strain! LOL

    Jerri Ann: thank you. And – we moved by choice. We just wanted to “get out” and I liked the warm weather. So I got a job here.

    Hiding: my mom said the same thing about still missing her mom.

    DeannaBanana: hahahhahahahaha

    John: you’re using my own advice on me? oh, damn John! LOL

    Sarah: you have to get away babe. It’s part of growing up. You just have to. You’ll be fine. ;-)

    Tasses (aka: Wonderer): I wonder how my kids will feel about it after a while.

    AmyD: well, yes, but you were also tied up with a piece of SHIT. :hug:

    Winter: oh, now, see – the Weather is one of the things that does NOT make me homesick. At all.

  47. Lisa says:

    You are amazing for the way you’ve embraced the experience the past year, the good with the bad and all of the change. Thanks for sharing and letting us in on such an incredible journey of growth over the past year.

  48. Selma says:

    You have done remarkably well in only a year. I am blown away. I have lived in Australia for 30 years and still feel homesick for the UK. I miss all my cousins and aunts and uncles. Most of the time it’s OK but sometimes I wish I’d never left. Good on you for embracing the change in such a positive way.

  49. Karl says:

    Yeah, it’s always difficult missing family and friends. I’m proud of you, though. You’ve proved a lot to yourself and to your family. You can make it anywhere.

  50. Shelli says:

    I totally get it. A couple years ago, I lost 30 pounds and was fitting into a size 8. Something I hadn’t done since, oh, I suppose before I was pregnant with Sam. It was awesome, even though I still had 40 pounds to go. Then I got complacent and, guess what? It all came back. I’m on my way back down because I, like you, have put my foot down. I am not going to go even a half size bigger than I am right now, even if it were possible to do that. I will get down to at least a 4 and that’s all there is fucking to it. We’ll do it, Britt. I know we can.

  51. Bettina says:

    For me it was almost the other way around. I am from Europe and went abroad to the US for a year. I wasn’t homesick at all while there, but since I’ve been back (more than a year already) I’ve been missing my friends and my life over there terribly!
    It’s probably different though if you live somewhere for a limited time, cause you now, you will be home soon and therefore miss people less.
    Still wish I could go back… good times

    Hopefully you will be able to build yourself a second support system in Florida!

  52. martymankins says:

    When I left my home in California 3 days after Christmas in 1987, I spent many months after that homesick. Missing my home, the area I grew up in. I eventually adjusted and took 2 trips a year to visit my mom and family still in Calif.

    Over 2 years ago, my mom passed away and I don’t really have any reasons to go back. But looking at some of the pictures I have, I miss the place I grew up in. A lots changed in over 20 years, but every so often, I find something that reminds me and makes me wish I lived there again, even though there’s many things that stand in the way of that.

    With it only being a year since you moved, your times of missing home are understandable. As most people say, as more time passes, you adjust. But trips home help, as they did for me.

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