100 Things: Part 3

Saturday, February 23rd, 2008

Welcome back for another addition of OMG LISTS GIVE ME REASONS TO POST ON SATURDAY!

Or, 100 Things About Me.

We’ve already covered 10 things about my family and 10 of my most memorable moments. Today we cap off a particularly moody week for me with another 10 things in a particularly moody vein.

I don’t like to use the word hate. I mean, I do (quite frequently actually), but I like to be one of those people who says they don’t like to use the word hate. Nonetheless, I give you…

100 Things About Miss Britt: 10 Things I Hate

  1. I hate when people don’t like me. I can’t decide if it’s a sign of immaturity on my part or an inherently vulnerable nature. But it bothers me. It doesn’t matter if it’s a stupid fucking troll whose opinion shouldn’t count – it still stings. I’ve spent a lot of time trying to fight through the fact that it bothers me. Right now, I’m just trying to accept that it does.

  2. I hate reformed smokers. Not all reformed smokers – because quitting is hard and if you can do it, good on you. But don’t wrinkle your fucking nose up at me like I’ve got the plague or am suddenly a second class citizen. I’m not going to smoke in your house or blow smoke in your pretty little face. Save your contempt for a weakness that you haven’t shouldered yourself.

  3. I hate Crocs. And OMG do not talk to me about how they are comfortable. You can get shoes that are comfortable and do not look like you just waded in off the nearest gay pride fishing boat. No, the little buttons you put on your neon pink styrofoam shoes do not make them fashionable. Your legs look short and dumpy and your feet look too big for your body. For the love of God, if you have to do comfortable get yourself a pair of Vans or Doc Martens or something made of a material that is not used to package electronic equipment.

  4. I hate overly intrusive waiters . I’m here to eat. And talk to the person I’m not paying to bring me my fucking food. Do your job, be polite, and quit trying to entertain me. Pretending to be my new BFF is not going to earn you a bigger tip.

  5. I hate wind on my face. Or rather, I hate air moving on my face. I can’t sit in front of a fan. When I have the air on in the car, I have to turn the vents away from me. It just bugs the shit out of me.

  6. I hate arrogant adults. When you’re 18 you’re supposed to think you know it all, or you’d be too paralyzed with fear to ever head out into the world on your own. But if you’re over the age of 21 and you still think you have it all figured out, you’re a fool. And worse than that, you’re wasting all of the opportunities that life has to offer you. There is something to be learned from everyone and everything you encounter. If you’re already done learning… you might as well be dead.

  7. I hate sushi. Blech. Yes, I’ve tried it. Yes, that kind too. It all tastes like what I imagine nasty poontang would taste like. Even if there is no fish in it, it tastes like it’s been dipped in vajajay juice that is not properly PH balanced.

  8. I hate foods that shouldn’t go together. Like fruit and meat. That’s just not right.

  9. I hate mean people. It’s not funny, it’s not cute, it’s not groundbreaking or edgy. It’s vile and disgusting and a blight on the face of humanity. The best purpose you can hope to serve in this world is to be a catalyst for growth and change by people who do not suck.

  10. I hate lying. My mom used to tell me that the two worst things you could do to another person were “lie and be mean.” In my head I assumed that lying must be the worst then, because it was mean to lie to someone. I try really, really hard not to lie. Whenever I am faced with the opportunity to do it, my stomach gets twisted and I feel like I’m filled with black goo. The most hurtful thing you could ever do to me is lie.

Blech. God, I feel like I need a shower now.

Tomorrow will be more fun with new contests and prizes.

And next week? Next week, I think it’s only fair to share 10 Things That I Love.

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  1. liv says:

    you know, it just seems like hate is a really wasted energy. my yoga master always encourages me to detach from that which might seek to engage my attention negatively. and in as much as it hurts when people don’t like you, i feel like it’s less reflective of a frailty or foible, and more a place for self examination.

    who was it who said we must be the change we wish to see in the world?

    ~om shanti~

  2. Hilly says:

    Woah, I hate every one of these things too! I’m especially irritated by Crocs and the people who say they’re comfy as well…I don’t care, they are ugly. Also? That whole “look at me, I’m so mean but I’m cute cause I use cute speak with my vitriol” thing? Old, tired and just plain hateful.

    Hilly’s last blog post..Friday Means I Ask You To Follow Me Everywhere….

  3. Mary says:

    Except for number 7, I think we might be twins that were separated at birth!

  4. RW says:

    Quit your damn smoking you fish-hating over-sensitive picky eater you! I don’t like you! Of course I’m lying…

    …and I think I’ve just crossed that line. :slaphead:

    RW’s last blog post..Doing Lately…

  5. Jay says:

    I totally agree with you on #4. It’s bad enough that I’m paying an inflated price for what will probably be below average quality food and there is probably a screaming baby sitting right behind me, I don’t need some waiter bugging the crap outta me the whole time too.

    Jay’s last blog post..The Most Depressing Mall In America …

  6. Dee says:

    Oh dear. I own Crocs. Admittedly, they are ONLY to wear on the beach and to the swimming pool, and that’s only because they are dead easy to clean afterwards, but still. And yes, I know they make your legs look shorter :lmao: I am so with you on #8 though – Apricot Chicken makes me shudder.

    Dee’s last blog post..Like a Tiger *grrrrrrr*

  7. DutchBitch says:

    AMEN at nr 3!!! Can you come over and explain that shit to my g/f’s. And tell them that is exactly WHY I refuse to walk anywhere nearer than 1,000 feet of them if they insist on continuing to wear those?

    Me no care hów comfortable they are and in how many cute colors you can buy them and Hell No! about the cute pins you can put on them… They’re the DEVIL!

    DutchBitch’s last blog post..Estoy Con Estúpido

  8. Dan says:

    I’m with you on 1, 4, 6, 9, & 10.

    Try as I might I don’t think I’d be able to reach the hights of hate for a pair of shoes. Stripy hippy woolly hats on adults on the other hand…

    Dan’s last blog post..Funds

  9. Kyra Sutra says:

    I hate people who always talk about how proud of themselves they are for accomplishing some weird shit or for living their dream.

    LOL.

    Kyra Sutra’s last blog post..Surely, tis not just me

  10. Penelope says:

    “It all tastes like what I imagine nasty poontang would taste like. Even if there is no fish in it, it tastes like it’s been dipped in vajajay juice that is not properly PH balanced.”….this made me snort tea right out of my nose this morning! Bloody hilarious!!

    Penelope’s last blog post..You really couldn’t make this up!

  11. avitable says:

    Okay, regarding #6: I disagree with you here.

    I know that I don’t know everything. But I also know that I have a higher IQ and more education than at least 90% of the population. If I were to try to see what small nugget of information I could learn from every idiot, retard, and moron out there, I’d just be spinning my wheels. The idea that you can learn something from everyone is complete bull.

  12. Miss Britt says:

    liv: I’m not sure how to respond to this. This comment was wayyyyyyyy deeper than the post was intended to be.

    Hilly: I am so relieved to know you don’t where Crocs. My love for you is now complete and pure.

    Mary: twins don’t let twins eat bad fish.

    RW: awww… you’re so cute. :poke:

    Jay: or singing to me. We had one SING the other day.

    Dee: I’m on to you Dee. Those things are way too expensive that you bought just for the Beach. Old Navy flip flops – $5. :spank:

    DutchBitch: OMG you have them over there too?!?!?!!? They’re taking over the world!

    Dan: tell me more about these hats…

    Kyra Sutra: but you don’t understand how hard I worked on that Guac!!!

    Penelope: I’m glad someone appreciated it!

    avitable: and some day I hope you’ll figure out that there is more to a person’s value than their IQ points or years of education.

    The idea isn’t bull. You’re just not evolved enough to understand it.

  13. hellohahanarf says:

    i was going to lie and tell you i don’t like you, but i just can’t. a) i absolutely love yew and b) i also abhor lies.
    (everyone comes to me about outfits and all because they know that i will say “i’m not a fan” if i don’t like something instead of saying, “you look great.”)

    mean people suck! they really, really do!

    wonder if you will think less of me when i tell you that i have black wedge shoes with a white stripe that were made by the crocs people. (yeah, the material might pack computers, but i so love these wedges.) and i like the croc flip flops. goofy ass colors, but flip flops are flip flops in my mind.

    now the clown shoe crocs? well, i hate them. but i have a pair. when i gotta scoop poop in the back yard, dammit i ain’t ruining good shoes (two large dogs make for a lot scoopin on a regular basis). i want something that if i miss something and step in it i don’t feel it on my bare skin and i can easily clean without touching. so yeah, i hate the look of my clown shoes, but i love the practical aspect. i will, however, promise to never wear them around you. deal?

  14. Tabitha says:

    I totally agree with you on all those points!!
    Well said…Can’t wait for your list of ‘Loves’
    will come back and check that out X

  15. Marissa says:

    The snotty non-smokers are sometimes worse than the reformed smokers. I quit, sort of (does smoking while drinking still mean you’ve quit if you don’t drink very often?), and while I enjoy not smelling like smoke, I’m not about to get a petition together that says smokers can’t stand within fifty feet of a building.

    Sushi is still trying to heal when the waiters bring it out. Ick! But a :martini: cures it all.

    Marissa’s last blog post..Insomnia

  16. avitable says:

    I said that I know that I don’t know everything. There are people I can learn from, and it has nothing to do with education or intelligence. Life experience can teach a lot.

    But not everyone has some intrinsic nugget of wisdom inside them. That’s just naive.

  17. I am totally with you on the lying. I hate liars too.

    themuttprincess’s last blog post..Since I am in the mood to steal things, might as well keep it harmless:

  18. Finn says:

    God yes. On 1-10. And I’m a recovering smoker. I’ll never be reformed. Never. Buwahaha!

    Finn’s last blog post..Closed For Repairs

  19. sizzle says:

    No sushi?! Ok well more for me! Yay!

    I hate crocs. They are up there with Ugh Boots as far as I am concerned. UGHHHHLY.

    sizzle’s last blog post..What’s True?

  20. kapgar says:

    I’m with you on the overly intrusive waiters. My dad and I were out to lunch a month or so ago and we had a waiter who actually sat down at our table and began an in-depth conversation with us about his life. He was a nice enough guy, but dang. We were talking without you and would’ve liked to continue. Our only saving grace was that he had an order come up and had to go deliver it. We finished our meal pretty quickly after that and left.

    kapgar’s last blog post..I feeeeeeel you…

  21. Allyson says:

    You spend time imagining what nasty pootang tastes like? hm. interesting.

    I’m glad you described the Crocs. I thought you were talking about Crocodiles. And I thought, “Well, I hope she doesn’t mind Alligators.” I can be dense, sometimes.

  22. green3 says:

    OMG – wind on the face is the WORST! I spend so much time adjusting the air conditioning vents in my car, the fan in my bedroom. I abhore ceiling fans. Hubby wants one in our bedroom but I am so against that!

    green3′s last blog post..Debt Project

  23. Nat says:

    I think you may have pin pointed why I hate crocs so much. Gay pride fishing boat. Love it. :)

    Nat’s last blog post..And I thought Fox news was the bottom of the barrel

  24. Dave2 says:

    Vajajay Juice? I looked at the supermarket next to the V-8 and couldn’t find it. Is this a specialty drink?

  25. Dee says:

    It’s true, I promise! They seem to act like snow shoes so no matter how soft the sand is you never sink…

    Dee’s last blog post..Like a Tiger *grrrrrrr*

  26. Patti says:

    #4 made me say “Oh hell yes!” The overly friendly waiter who also insists on calling me “sweetie” or “hon” is the bane of my eating-out existence.

    Patti’s last blog post..It’s Winter…but This is a Different Kind of Frozen

  27. MB says:

    Wow! That was weird saying “me too” to every single thing on that list. Can’t wait to see the top 10 loves.

    MB’s last blog post..Stir Crazy

  28. Laura says:

    1. I luv you.
    2. I’ve never smoked. I am, however, a reformed drinker. Currently off the wagon.
    3. I would like to gather all the Crocs of the world and have a great big bonfire. Do you suppose they burn? Maybe just melt them in the microwave…
    4. I like them to show up, take my order, show up again to deliver my order, show up one more time to check and make sure I don’t need anything, then only show up again at the end with the bill.
    5. K. Can’t get behind this one. I NEED the fan on at night to sleep.
    6. I think the current generation shouldn’t be considered “adult” until they’ve at LEAST told their parents, “I’m sorry, you were right, you were always right, and I sucked for the first twenty-five years of my life.”
    7. Shame on you. Try a “crab crunch” roll at Kona Grill. Nom nom nom.
    8. How do you feel about pineapple on pizza?
    9. and 10. You and me? We’re RIGHT THERE.

    Laura’s last blog post..Awesome.

  29. Miss Britt says:

    hellohahanarf: I won’t think LESS of you (My mother has a bright pink pair that she LOVES!!)

    But I won’t let you dress me either. :evil:

    Tabitha: please do.

    Marissa: oh yeah, don’t get me wrong. When you’re not smoking (GOOD FOR YOU!!!!) it smells awful.

    avitable: you are so arrogant. I’m not even talking about “some intrinsic knowledge”. I said there is something to be learned.

    I’m sorry you’re not understand. I don’t speak caveman.
    :-P

    themuttprincess: because you are also awesome, like me.

    Finn: but good for you for recovering. That is so hard! Awesome!

    sizzle: Uggs look cute on SOME people in SOME situations though.

    kapgar: OMG! And how do you complain in that situation? “Um, excuse me, I. don’t. CARE.”

    Allyson: only when someone tries to make me eat sushi.

    green3: we have a ceiling fan in the bedroom (FLORIDA!), but if it’s on I have to cover myself from head to toe so I can’t feel it.

    Nat: I am glad to spread the message.

    Dave2: yes. Look in the ethnic food aisle.

    Dee: mmmmmm hhhhhhhh :nana:

    Patti: “sweetie” or “hon” when they are 5 years YOUNGER than you!

    MB: I make people feel weird. It’s what I do.

    Laura: microwaving crocs is probably the best idea I’ve ever heard.

    And I pineapple on pizza is WRONG!

  30. MB says:

    Yeah, but weird in a good way :)

    MB’s last blog post..Stir Crazy

  31. Clown says:

    You can take 9 and 10 and shove them up your stupid ass. You’re lucky I’m out of the country to receive an award right now.

  32. Sheila says:

    I don’t care if people don’t like me. I know I’m a lot to handle. BUT I really hate when I don’t know why they don’t like me.

    Reformed Smokers are the worst. I love the line “It’s such a disgusting habit.” Oh! AND “It’s not that hard to quit so why don’t you?” UM BECAUSE I DONT WANT TO!

    Sushi definitely = vajayjay juice. I tried it once and had to leave work early because just the leftover taste in my mouth (I never actually managed to swallow it) kept making me dry heave.

    I love your Hate List.

    Sheila’s last blog post..A Smorgasbord of Information

  33. Y2K Survivor says:

    I am one of those reformed smokers. What’s worse is my job involves a lot of anti-tobacco work. But when I quit, long long ago, all my friends came to me and asked, “You aren’t going to turn into one of those guys that always complains about others smoking, will you?” Naturally I was upset that they even asked, since that was the only motivation I had to stop in the first place… fuggin ingrates!

    Truthfully, being around smoke usually doesn’t bother me. The fact that my clothes smell only sinks after I get home. Now I will admit the smell of other objects brought into my house DOES bother me. Clothing, camera bags, once even some laminated sheets of music completely took over the room they were resting in, by stench alone. It does occur to me at those times… wow what were my lungs like?!

    But honest, while I am one of THOSE guys… I really don’t think I am.

  34. Selma says:

    I agree with everything on your list but my pet hate at the moment besides my friend’s dog who keeps trying to hump my leg – pet hate, get it? – is weird food combinations. At a friend’s place for dinner recently I was served steak with fried bananas. It was meant to be a Caribbean dish but it was just really nasty. I don’t believe steak and bananas should ever be on the same plate. Uuugggh.

    Selma’s last blog post..The Sound Of Time A-Passing

  35. Miss Britt says:

    MB: of course!

    Clown: I can’t wait until you get back. Hopefully you’ll entertain us all with stories of your adventures!

    :angel:

    Sheila: there is never a good reason to hate me. I am AWESOME.

    Heh.

    Y2K Survivor: I can understand it. I really can – because when I’m not smoking the smell is overwhelming.

    But if we’re outside somewhere and I want to smoke… well.. just shut up. OK? ;-)

    Selma: ooooh I had fried plantains (sp??) the other night at this Brazilian restaurant. They were SOOOOOOOOOOOOO good!!!

  36. Froggywoogie says:

    This is a GREAT post! Delicately and cleverly written. Very good idea to talk about your body with a letter to it/him :)

    Froggywoogie’s last blog post..Recycling

  37. Sam says:

    I work at a diner (hostess not waitress) and the waitresses who are friendly definitely get tipped more than the grumpy ones.

    Sam’s last blog post..Hard Shrinking

  38. Miss Britt says:

    FRIENDLY I like. Overly INTRUSIVE.. not so much.

    I was a waitress for a long, long time – and there is definitely a line.

  39. Hey, check out my unwrinkled fucking nose :-) Just thought I’d stop by and lay down a few words.

    Best wishes,

    Reformed Smoker

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